Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
tell your sister to shave her snatch
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
