perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
