"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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