ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
