when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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