i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
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