You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
