the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Ladies don't puke and tell
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
