carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Slut skills are useful in every country.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
