What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize