Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I wish they made helmets for livers.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she peed on how many people?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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