North Korea, Best Korea!
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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