I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Randomize
