I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
