well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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