Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
