I didn't shave. On purpose
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
