Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
