i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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