I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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