tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
