Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
