she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
