anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize