Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
