So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
