scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
