garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Im part way to drunk.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
