I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
