Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize