I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
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