maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
