now i know why i became what i already was.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Bring me that man meat
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
