He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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