Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
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