didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
