Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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