Do you still have your period?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Randomize
