Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
