Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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