Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
