I don't think brook has ever known best
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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