and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
