Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
