Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
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