sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
