remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
