I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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