i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
