He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
