You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
