Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I just found puke in my bra..
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
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